What Day Is It?

Things have just been insane at work lately, I know I shouldn’t be surprised I run a CPA office and it is tax time. This is nothing new I have been doing this for over seven years, but really I told someone today on the phone that it was Friday. I guess that was wishful thinking that the week is over because that means there is only one more day of the craziness.

The downside to my work life being so crazy is I slack off on all the other things in my world. I am just so tired and lazy by time I walk through my door at night that the last thing on my mind is taking care of myself. Because of this lack of motivation my diet has slacked a bit over the last few weeks and I have hovered in this gain a pound loose a pound roller coaster for about 3 to 4 weeks already. While at work I am making good choices; luckily for me our office is part of a fruit of the month club so there is fresh fruits around and I have a drawer of yummy health bars to snack on.  I even make a few bad choices like indulging in a fun size candy bar here and there but nothing that is a diet killer.  It is the after work decisions that I am not doing so well on I know I am not making smart choices.  I own up to the fact that I would rather hit the drive thru than go home and cook something.  It is almost like I do not have an appetite for anything but junk food.  I do wish my days had been a couple hours shorter so I could have used my crock pot more, but that thing cooks on the high end to begin with so a 12 hr day my food is going to be a rock by time I get there.  So I am really looking forward for this tax season being over so that I can get back on track.  I am even too lazy to work out after work; first off because I don’t have any energy and the other is after a work out I get a burst of energy which makes it hard to get to bed.  So when you are coming in your door at 8:30 pm you only have so many hours before you need to get in bed to start the cycle over.  Which means if I work out all that new energy makes me stay up late which makes my next day at work horrible because I am tired.  It is a viscous circle, especially since I can’t bring myself to get out of bed earlier in the morning to work out before work because I like my sleep.  Maybe one day I will get that motivation but it just hasn’t hit me yet I really prefer to sleep.  I just haven’t broken up the love affair with my bed.

I have set some personal goals that have had to be altered due to my laziness over the last few months but I do want to be 30 lbs down by the middle of the July, which will hopefully keep me on my goal to start 2014 by being down a total of 90 – 100 lbs, that is one full year of weight watchers.  So I really hope that after the 15th I can make some changes and form a routine so that when the next deadline in September rolls around I don’t let the laziness hit me and I slack off again!

The one positive thing I have been doing to combat the laziness is doing at least one house upgrade or change a weekend, I do it on the weekend so I am not trying to accomplish things after a long work day.  It seems to be helping a bit, like this past weekend I managed to clean my patio furniture and get it ready to be transported to my parent’s house this coming weekend hopefully.  Doesn’t seem like much, but really, if you live in a desert you know how dusty life is.  There was a nice layer of dirt on everything so it was nice to finally clean things up.  By doing these things to my house it is helping me feel less lazy and like I am doing more than just taxes.  It also leads me into doing other things as well because I start to get in a groove, I then managed to sweep up the patio get it all cleaned up, then I gathered up all my clothing donations that have been sitting in a huge pile in the corner of my room making my room feel disorganized and got them dropped off a the donation center and last but not least finally took all the empty shoe boxes out of my closet and put in the recycle bin.  So it was one big project followed by three little ones and it really helped put me in a better mood.  I finally felt like my world wasn’t all about taxes.  Hopefully I can keep this up through out the rest of the year, because I notice focusing on my house helps me focus on me just a little bit more.  Now if I could just not love cheeseburgers so much I would be in a better place I am sure!

The Odd Side of Weight Loss

I have been dieting for just around 6 months now, and have lost a respectable 24 and half pounds.  Who would have ever that that half a pound or even a tenth of a pound would matter but wow does it.  Especially on weeks where you only lose two tenths of a pound, but hey at least you didn’t gain.  This becomes your mantra and any decrease is good, even though in reality you are cursing yourself that you didn’t loose more.  Which leads me to why I call this post the odd side of weight loss; it is because even though I have lost over 20 pounds to me I look exactly the same.  So I see on the scale the change but physically I am still all there, except in my wrists and feet.  This to me just seems so random, I have dieted before even on this exact same diet which by they way is Weight Watchers but the weight is coming off in very different ways than the first time I did it.

Now I don’t have some obscurely tiny wrist or anything but all of a sudden the bracelet I have worn for almost three years can easily be slipped off which it never did before, it use to fit just a little loose around the wrist and I would have to unclasp it to get it on and off.  It was made to fit my wrist specifically and is made out of white gold, so it isn’t like over two years it stretched.  I had the bracelet made for me because I could never find anything in the store that fit.  So it just baffles me that I need to have it made smaller by just over an inch.  It seems so odd that this is where my body decided to loose weight.

I am sure this is totally normal and it is a good change especially for the feet side, I am not a size smaller or anything but I do notice that things fit either looser or just better overall.  This too me is a really good thing, because shoes are my enemy, I hate shopping for them because they never come in my size.  I wear a size 11 normally but I can wear 10s or 12s depending all on the shoe and designer.  So I try not to let it define me but it drastically limits what I can comfortably put on my feet because most stores only care up to a 10 in anything that is fashionable.  Once you hit the 11 – 12 mark you start wearing orthopedic looking shoes that are thick and have velcro.  Just typing that description makes by brow furrow.  So I am looking forward to just maybe getting into a size 10 at some point as my starting size instead of an 11.  I should also note that if I have my foot measured it always comes up at a 10, but 10s rarely fit right.  So this has more to do with the industry than my body personally.

Because this process has been going on for 6 months and I would say I have at least 10 more months before I reach my ultimate goal but I can’t help but wish I showed a greater physical change than I do, while having smaller wrists and feet is nice it doesn’t really alter me visually.  Which ultimately is a nice side effect of loosing weight.  While most of us choose to loose weight mainly for health benefits no one can deny that really it is to look better in clothing.  We are just programmed that way.  Or if you are me it is just to get out of the plus size boxy section and into misses sized clothing where they define curves.  I don’t want to even get started on the drastic difference in clothing between misses and plus size because I can talk for days about how designers think plus size needs to be square that is a whole other post.  As well as the fact that women’s section in department stores is actually plus size clothing, they just don’t call it plus size.

I just decided that I was not focusing on me and it was starting to show physically and then I reached back to my highest weight ever in 2012 and knew that it was time to make a change.  I hope to post more about my journey I am on a goal of loosing 100 lbs and when I look at it that way being almost a quarter of the way there it doesn’t seem that big of a goal.